she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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