I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
