she told me i tasted like america
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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