Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
