no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize