I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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