Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
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