So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
