i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
