I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize