I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize