Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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