I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
