Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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