Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
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