I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
you never un-have a 4some
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
