come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
My cat gives me a boner
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
