I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
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