I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Randomize