Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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