there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
