Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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