Christians are straight up FREAKS
Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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