I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Randomize
