Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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