I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
