It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
