he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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