There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Randomize
