We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
