U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Randomize
