She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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