is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
should my penis look like a turkey
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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