lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
