This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize