beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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