I wish i was in the wii world.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
