before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
