do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
