im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
