he wants to bone in the snuggie
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
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