Sry I called you an 8
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
