Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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