just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
