I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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