question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize