i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Randomize
