sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
