I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize
