put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
