I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
it glows. i had to have it.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
